Heaven Birthdays

Nine years ago today, I held my momma's hand as she met Jesus.

I've missed her a lot of the past nine years, but especially so in the past year. In the past year, my brother got married. He had a little girl. My other brother had another little boy. And I got engaged and have been planning my wedding. She has missed so much.

Over the Christmas break, my entire family got together to celebrate. When we sat down for Christmas dinner, I was overcome with a feeling of pain and loss. Around the table were all of my loved ones, laughing and having a good time. But my mom wasn't there. And my mom lived for those kinds of moments. She would have been in heaven at that table.

But then I looked around the table. When my sister laughed, I could hear my mom laughing. When my little brother was cracking jokes, I could see her silliness through him. When my older brother said the blessing, I could hear her faith coming through him- the faith that she taught us and raised us in. When my two year old nephew smiled, I could see her beautiful smile on his face.

And I was reminded that while she may not have been at that dinner table physically, she was there. She will always be there, through all of these milestones. She is there through us and the things that she taught us. Her spirit will live on through us until the day that we are reunited again. And the feeling of pain and loss went away and was replaced with JOY and hope and love.

I love you mom. Happy 9th heaven birthday! We miss you so much down here.